and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
