i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Randomize
