Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Alive.
So much puke
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
