You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
