Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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