I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
