I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
im holly from the hills drunk
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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