i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
