Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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