playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
Randomize
