i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
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