We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
