You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Randomize