i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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