she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
