Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
