I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Come see our sink grown plant.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
