shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
