Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
