...so i touched it.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Randomize
