You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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