she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
