i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize