kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
