i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
