Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
im calling her cock vulture from now on
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
