go do what you do best...puke behind churches
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Just invented taco cereal.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
