I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
