dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
i just told my mom tuesday boozeday rhymes so that she can remember not to text or call me on wednesday mornings
youre going to kill that woman one of these days
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
The struggles of a small town man whore
If I had your ass I would rule the world
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
