Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize
