if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Randomize
