my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
My vagina is very pro this idea
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
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