I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
