Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize