I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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