he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
