another moral hangover. fuck.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
