I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize