Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
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