K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
Dignity is for republicans.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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