So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
