"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
