We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize