would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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