no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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