Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
