I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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