More tranny stories later!
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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