I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
