I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize