and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
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